A lumberjack axes performance anxiety

This week I gave a presentation for the Bryanston International Summer School where I shared my expertise on performance anxiety for musicians.

First, I concocted a tale of a lumberjack’s journey, and then ‘translated’ it into its significance for musicians onstage. You’ll enjoy it, I promise! Here are the two parts below.

The lumberjack’s journey: an extended metaphor

Imagine you’re a lumberjack in the Canadian wilderness. You have a job to do. You’re going to drive your beaten up pick-up truck full of logs along the track from the logging camp to the local sawmill. Sounds simple, right?

But no; there are quite a lot of things to get in place.

Your truck is quite beaten up. It’s not perfect. But you should still do everything you can to maintain it and avoid a breakdown. Check the brakes, the oil and the lights etc. before you set off.

Although the track to the sawmill is the same, your journey on it is different every time. Each time you take that journey, you will ride on different parts of the track due to factors such as your speed, the weather, your mood or any obstacles in your way. Maybe a rabbit, a flying squirrel or even a grizzly bear will jump out in your path and you’ll need to steer yourself back on track.

It would be a good idea to practise the route without any logs in your pick-up so you know you can handle the journey well.

When you do transport your logs, you’d better know what’s in there. And you’d also better tie those logs together because you don’t want one to roll around and throw you off balance.

Finally, when you’ve set off on your journey, you’d better concentrate on the track. After all, you’re a professional with a job to do. If your truck starts veering off to one side, you’d better steer it back onto the track all the way to your destination.

Translating the lumberjack’s tale for musicians

Now you’re familiar with the lumberjack’s journey, let’s see what it might mean for musicians.

1. Your truck is quite beaten up. It’s not perfect.

You’re a human being like everyone else, with all your vulnerabilities and foibles and imperfections. No-one expects you to be otherwise. Of course, look after your wellbeing through diet, exercise, proper sleep and practices such as Alexander Technique. But don’t fool yourself into thinking you can or should be perfect. What you watched on TV last night or what you ate for breakfast, or the weather, or the state of the world, can easily influence your performance. Therefore, show up imperfect and be ok with that.

2. Although the track to the sawmill is the same, your journey is different every time.

In a similar way, there is also no such thing as a perfect performance. You might be playing the same piece of music (the ‘track’), but every single performance (or ‘journey’) will be different. The setting, the instrument, the acoustic and importantly you are different every time. And that’s how it should be. The audience wants to hear you communicate something in the moment – they don’t want you to press play on a recording.

3. It would be a good idea to practise the route without any logs in your pick-up so you know you can handle the journey well.

Get used to performing at home and elsewhere. Then, there’s a chance that performing on stage can feel both familiar and exhilarating at the same time – a bit like confidently whooshing down a ski slope after a long climb to the top.

Here are some things to try while you’re practising performing:

• every so often, perform a piece from start to finish without stopping for anything.
• video your performance and you’ll inure yourself to the unforgiving, cyclops gaze of a smartphone.
• run up and down stairs a few times just before playing so that you get used to the sensation of performing with an elevated heartbeat.
• perform at home in your concert gear to see what it feels like.
• take every opportunity to perform for friends, family or the dog.

4. When you do transport your logs, you’d better know what’s in there. And you’d also better tie those logs together because you don’t want one to roll around and throw your truck off balance.

The logs in your pick-up truck represent the fullness of feeling you can be carrying around before and during your performance. 

But hear this: performance nerves will only become overwhelming and throw you off balance if they are the only thing you’re feeling.

Instead, follow a two stage process. First, acknowledge the fear and thank it for telling you that what you’re doing matters and that you have a job to do. Acknowledging and verbalising the fear will often reduce its intensity.

Second, it’s helpful to place that fear securely within a bunch of other containing emotions (‘logs’). We’re not ignoring the fear (which doesn’t work) but are instead monitoring it with curiosity as it arises, and then consciously connecting with other emotions at the same time. These emotions can include, for example:

• the kindness you have towards yourself (also known as self-compassion);
• the thrill and enjoyment of music-making;
• the emotions of the piece itself (which is why it’s important to feel the emotions of the piece as you practise it); 
• your respect for any fellow performers;
• a certain amount of irritation at your performance nerves, and a little bit of strictness with yourself;
• and don’t forget your sense of humour!

(thank you to Barbara Conable for this set of insights).

5. Finally, when you’ve set off on your journey, you’d better concentrate on the track. After all, you’re a professional with a job to do. If your truck starts veering off to one side, you’d better steer it back onto the track all the way to your destination.

Staying on track means remaining calm and alert as far as possible. Various things can take you off balance: a mistake here, a cough in the audience there, a little bit of mind wandering, a memory lapse etc. But this is what performance is – different every time and with an element of risk. 

The skill is to expect surprises – externally or from your own performance – so that you can routinely bring yourself back on track following a distraction. This is why steering a vehicle is such a good analogy: even an average driver knows that this is their most important job.

But how do we manage to stay on track? In addition to widening our emotional landscape as explained above, it is possible to ‘dial down’ our level of alertness (arousal) in real time through changes to our breath, vision and muscle tone. This can be done before or during performances; find out how here.

In addition, imaginative exercises can help such as:-

• sending your energy out into the four corners of the room;
• flooding the space with your favourite colour;
• hearing your superhero cape flap behind you as you walk on stage.

A final approach to mention here is meditation, which can be practised in the lead up to performance so that aspects can be recalled on stage or in the green room. Examples include a performance anxiety meditation and an inner smile meditation. The supportive, smiling face in the latter can very readily be brought with you into the performance space.

Conclusion

It is normal and healthy to feel nervous before or during a performance. Having said that, we need pathways to help minimize any negative effects nerves might have on our performance. The above is one set of solutions. To develop the capacity to overcome the problem requires dedication as well the drive to put yourself forward for enough performances to try out the strategies. But as anyone who has enjoyed performing will confirm, the rewards are great.